9 Mindset Habits That CHANGED MY LIFE College Career Success Self Care Mental Health Growth




BeautifulBrwnBabyDol,mindset,fixed mindset,on the run,success,growth,law of attraction,intelligence,wealth,tips and tricks,anxiety,negative thoughts,control mind,self confidence,motivational speaker,success habits,subconscious mind,self improvement,healthy habits,productivity,successful habits,growth mindset,self care,self help books,self care tips,self love habits,mindfulness,mindfulness practice,college,university,college vlog,college life

I love people in my circle to tell me honey you stay you need to go take a shower and I mean that spiritually mentally emotionally and physically someone who's going to hold me accountable but also knows how to motivate me it's time for you to start to seek those relationships that really take you to the next level and help you to learn and grow what's up y'all that should girl dr. Nina and today I'm gonna share with you guys nine mindset habits that have really helped to change my life they've made me more successful in all areas of my life including my work life and career relationships friendships when I was in school I really started to implement these the beginning of the year everybody talked about new me new you knew everybody new shoes new clothes new hair to be honest it seems like we're really not renewing ourselves we're too busy looking at and comparing ourselves to other people and a lot of times we just need to work on ourselves and I'm gonna provide you guys some of my favorite quotes intertwined in this as well as some of the resources that I use that you can start to check out I saw a video by Rowena spy who talked a lot about her journey on her seven habits that changed her life so hopefully today you'll find some things that you can use in your day-to-day life that I can tell you will most likely change a lot of things about you and also change the environment around you so let's get into it and while I have you make sure you thumbs up this video if you liked it comment share and subscribe to this channel and also my vlog channel make sure that you come back on all Thursdays and some Sundays for video uploads and also be sure to turn on that notification bell so you know when I upload jewelry for bringing you guys today's video they really lace to me it's some really cute jewelry that keeps me authentic genuine and feeling real good about my I'll keep it short cuz y'all have seen them in a lot of my videos but I love these name plate necklaces as well as this beautiful longitude and latitude necklace I picked this time represent in st. Louis I also got this beautiful rose gold initial ring with my initials as well as this black beautiful embellished bangle which you can pick out what you want your bangles to say I also love for a great Valentine's Day idea this flowering ring that has my name on it I thought it was so cute with all the looks colors and combinations they have over on their website I think you will love them and the jewelry is built to last it's gonna help you feel good and if you give it as a gift it'll help someone else feel good so make sure you use my link and coat down below Nina FS 15 and get 15% off the your next purchase check the links down below for all of the items I have here so one of the things that I had to do during my journey I had to accept where I was in comparison to where I wanted to go in life whether you come from a council estate or Country Estate your success will be determined by your own confidence and fortitude that's by Michelle Obama oftentimes people I mentor and work with have asked me how I've gotten into this place if I'm from st. Louis I was raised in a town called Berkeley within st. Louis it's not like the best in places to grow up I also grew up part of my life in Memphis I was guilty of thinking that people just had success come to them maybe they came from a good family maybe they just had money already and they really didn't have to do much but I think my mother stopped that pretty early and it's never too late to stop those thought processes I started to really observe those that simply work hard and work smart they have to look at where they were in comparison to where they wanted to go I knew where I was growing up I knew the things that I was getting and my mother did a wonderful job with very little that taught me that I wanted to be able to give the most to those around me so I have to figure out what does that look like you can't want to give to people when you haven't given to yourself one of those first journeys was losing 108 pounds and keeping it off I had to dedicate some time to grow I had to become a butterfly if you know about a butterfly they go from a caterpillar to a whole butterfly they go from one species so pretty much a whole nother one and it's got to be uncomfortable if you've ever seen a butterfly come out of a chrysalis it's not beautiful but when they start to dry their wings off and they start to fly it's gorgeous and almost everybody is taken by storm a lot of times we're afraid to go through that growth period we're afraid to go through the hurtful points we have to really hold ourselves accountable in order to grow so that we can give to others if your caterpillar that's okay look at where you want to go the butterfly there's going to be battles there's going to be struggles there's going to be growth and paid before you get there there's also gonna be joy it comes during the journey when you prove to yourself that you can stick to something kick its ass and get it done yes I want it to be dr. Nina but it took a lot of steps in between I've also had to learn who I was during the process nothing about it was easy I know joy in sticking with it sometimes we only want to sit with something for one minute and expect it to work you get what you put in remember that check the information section for my free eight-day supernatural video program which will get you started on your way I also love to keep memorable items around that remind me of my purpose who I am and what I am if I had to learn from my failures and be able to see better for myself if my future were determined just by my performance on a standardized test I wouldn't be here I guarantee you that again a quote by Michelle Obama and all the things you guys say that you consider me successful and I guarantee you for every win I had at least twenty failures and probably more life is too short to waste it on what coulda woulda should have been I knew that I had to be an action I had to be about that life I ended one of the semesters in my first year of college with a point eight nine GPA let it sink in point eight nine but I am here today dr. Nina Ellis Hervey licensed psychologist licensed specialist and school psychology associate a tenured professor certified professional life coach motivational speaker clinic director god only knew and I had to be willing to do what was necessary I saw that point eight nine and I said never a kid never mhm I told myself I deserved more and if I wanted more I was gonna have to put in more I couldn't say that that was the best decision of my life it started the beautiful storm that y'all see I was gonna make excuses yes I cried yes I got mad but I learned from those failures and I picked up and moved on sometimes with failures we like to sweep them under the carpet but they only gonna come haunt you later when you pick up the carpet and try to move look at dissect them figure out what you could have done better to avoid that and you'll start to become a problem solver so next time you'll do things differently don't always be so quick to give up because you fail sometimes because we don't keep pushing past we never see what could be instead of us thinking about that we can actually do it down below I blink some of my all-time favorite books like The Alchemist which really helps you understand the journey understanding yourself and more about life altogether and I also love the secret the power for the very same reason the next thing I have to learn to do is to not get bitter but to get better it is hardly possible to build anything in frustration bitterness in a mood of helplessness prevail something my mother taught me take the meat and leave the bones take the things that nourish you take the things that you can learn from even if it's a bad situation if you're ending a relationship having a divorce ending a job got laid off lost your job if you're not really doing well on the fitness bandwagon then if you try five different diets and none of those work you still need to take the meat from those so whatever nourish you there was a time where you saw at least a small game what can you build on from that that's the meat of the situation the bones are the things that maybe didn't work in your favor even though you thought it out and you thought it was right even though you leave the bones you're gonna look at those bones and study them so you can get more meat the next time there are things I didn't like in school that I hated I don't like having to repetitively go to a classroom I didn't like having to always listen to someone talk or having to take a test it strengthened my mind my body it also strengthened me to believe that I was able to stand the test of time even when things were hard I kept pushing I kept learning I kept growing so even though you might find bones you still got some meat in there and it keeps you getting better instead of getting thinner and with that you also have surround yourself with good people I want people in my circle to tell me honey you stay you need to go take a shower and I mean that spiritually mentally emotionally and physically someone who's going to hold me accountable but also knows how to motivate me it's time for you to start to seek those relationships that really take you to the next level and help you to learn and grow get a mentor really shows you how to meet those goals and also have to see what's possible in your life whenever I wanted a mentor I would always volunteer to do something for them instead of asking for things from them remember that a person that you consider successful many people consider successful you need to make sure you try to get on their schedule try to help them with something work for them for free do something that's gonna allow you to have that personalized time with them because that successful person believe me maybe they have a goal in mind and they're not gonna let a lot of things get in the way so you have to make their time just as important to you as it is to learn from them get a relationship that's mutually beneficial and respectful the books I love they help you step out on faith are daring greatly by brené Brown when I my favorites and also black pearls even if you're not african-american it's a really good daily devotional I also love a prayer book I keep prayer books around because sometimes I don't know specific things to pray especially when I really want to reach a goal looking to build good relationships and friendships and my friend got me this book the gift of friendship great one the next thing I had to do was to be willing to be flexible and change my direction stay committed to your decisions but stay flexible in your approach things won't always go as you envision but that doesn't mean you can't take a detour if your favorite highway is closed down and you still have to get from point A to point B you're gonna find a way there it's the same thing with your goals but for some reason we've learned that it's okay to just give up we don't believe in what we can't see and that's faith you have to make sure that you have faith and even what you can't see that's why it's important to put good examples in front of you some of you all have told me you don't have people around like they look for them on the internet find different things that motivate and inspire you some things might be fashion go to the store look at good pictures go to art museums those are things that are going to keep your mind fresh and hopeful so that detour is important even if it doesn't come out the way that you want you're going to gain something from it but when you don't give yourself a chance when you don't take that detour you never learn exactly how strong you are one of the books I love in this area is one month to live by my pastor Kerri and Chris shook amazing book that really challenges you to live every day like it's your last the next thing I had to do was try therapy in spite of being afraid dressing up is like therapy I feel better in myself when I've made an effort therapy makes you look at yourself it's a reflective experience and though you might think you know it all if you really allow a true therapeutic process with a good therapist for you you'll find that you're starting to do reflective work and figure out the motivations behind the things that you do you'll start to think about why you might move the way you do or why you feel the way you do I started going to therapy when I was in undergrad and I've been in therapy faithfully for the past seven almost eight years guys it's not a joke for me I love to go to therapy every two weeks because it helps me keep things in check and align just like you get maintenance on your car just like I hope you're taking your buck to the doctor to get maintenance on your body you still need to get maintenance on the mind it's not always because you have problems that's the common misconception we're afraid because we believe it's admission to weakness when it's actually strength I see it as proactive as opposed to reactive so instead of more that therapy when something happens if you're already going even once a month once every other month you're gonna have some self reflection self assurance and you'll know more about you and appreciate the processes of your mind and your heart trip yourself down see yourself for who you are and become the expert on you and I really truly believe that therapy assisting has truly assisted me in my journey in therapy it has really taught me my strengths and weakness's friend of mine bought me this the kid's gonna be okay Journal which is for the warrior who thinks of all the things that could go wrong instead of what could go right the next thing I had to do was stop comparing myself to others and to be patient and kind with myself while building and upholding my own standards now this quote is funny but you'll get the picture if I don't want to feel like I need to get my together and that's by yours surely the one thing I had to start to realize about my fitness journey about my career success in goals about my high school life was that my race was no one else's if you start running in on somebody else's races you might not even know what you're bringing you might run into a race where they run in a 50-yard dash but you came prepared to run a marathon they might be running 100-yard dash and you only came equipped for a 50-yard dash so if you start running other people's races you start to set yourself up for failure if you don't start to make your own standards of what it means to be successful you'll get cloudy it's not even a race that ends so you're trying to end a race and somebody else is still on a track they still run they still trying to do they face none of us are in the same race and when I stop comparing myself to other people when I tell you it freed my world my life it made me feel more productive I started to feel more like who I was supposed to be you know I was a late bloomer right so I didn't even have a boyfriend when everybody else got their first boyfriend I used to look at that like oh well I feel my time with other things I was classically trying to piano cello viola violin rapping and singing doing my thing I just think that God wanted me to develop more personally first get my talents in order know what I wanted from life and start to think about what was more essential for me and so I couldn't see myself as a part of the race I couldn't keep on comparing myself it was getting me nowhere they were running off a rulebook that I had no access to the rules on that race I didn't know what they were we all can win but we have to win in our own way you can learn from others in their story you can learn from me my story my goals but always encourage you guys to take your own rap your own path use your strengths and weaknesses to get you to where you want to go not someone elses two books that help with this are thinking Grow Rich and lean in the next thing I had to do was to take control of my thoughts I have to be respectful of them but take control of those bad boys bad news is that you can control nothing but your thoughts good news is that with your thoughts you can control everything else I used to be very reactive reactive to everything so what someone said about me so what they said they felt about me so a mean thing they did to me but what I learned was that reactive stuff gets you nowhere I had so learned that there's a order two things and I had to learn restraint I couldn't just jump every time somebody says something about me or because my emotions were out of whack one thing my therapist always says is that you can't always believe what you think we've convinced ourselves that everything we think is absolutely fat and that's not true you have to start to build resilience in a way that nourishes the fact that everything you think is not always reality when a thought comes I have to kind of change it I have to think for the best I have to switch it around I have to get more clarity and think about what I'm really afraid of and make that more positive or divert my attention to something else until I can really return to that and think of it clearly I don't say what I can't take back anything I say I act as if I could be responsible for even if it comes to gossip so if I say it I want to make sure that I could say it to the person and if I have to stand before the person and say it that I would say it can't always say what you think you can't always think what you say it's true no act just because you have a thought take time gain some clarity and that'll help you get better control of yourself and also those thoughts it's something that happens we start to think of everything that is going wrong in our lives and we start to take on a victim mentality meaning that we start to think that everything is coming against us nothing's going our way but unfortunately there are times in our lives that life is just like that you have a choice to be more positive or to be more negative negativity breeds more negativity even if that means sitting out for a while being upset being hurt for a little while that's fine but spending all of your time being upset hurt harp and mad at the world not cool I love a regular journal that I can jot down ideas and thoughts freely to help me ease my thoughts the next thing I had to do was experience things and find out what I loved we have to be honest about what we want and take risks rather than lie to ourselves and make excuses to stay in our comfort zone I know a lot of us think we know it all and we know everything be willing to find out things are different from what you knew be willing to step outside of the comfort zone you've been working that same job for 25 years and you're interested in switching careers maybe you should start to study a little not saying quit your job immediately start to study something else see if it interest you but you will never know until you try everyone around me growing up had their definition of what successful was of what jobs or careers for successful I don't remember anybody saying that I could be all the things that I've become I had to be willing to step outside of that comfort zone try it out see what works for me and even fail a few times at different things that didn't work for me and if you don't do that how would you know what's for you I always tell people to be uncomfortable with getting comfortable you're gonna be so uncomfortable when you change when you grow and you learn that you have to become more comfortable in that state if you want to build if you want to grow know that you're gonna go through some discomfort it's not gonna feel good all the time if you stop learning and growing you'll be very miserable so think of it that way and last but certainly not least one of the things that my channel has really honed in on is the ways that I've learned to take care of myself and I have to follow through take care of your inner spiritual beauty that will reflect in your face you have to do things like make sure that you rest take care of your mental physical spiritual and emotional health I do the things on this channel because they hold me accountable to I love showing you different things that I'm engaging in that actually make me feel good exercising every day eating well all of those things have fed my spirit and those are the things that help me look better from the inside to the outside and I've been convinced that a lot of times when people see me and they call me beautiful they're not just saying what's on the outside they're seeing what he illuminates from the inside I'm truly a transparent happy being it took me a while to get there and self care was a big part of that I can't give to others if I don't give to myself slow down take your time and those of you all that are saying you can't think you got time for all the headaches you got time for all the being over weights you have the time for all the health conditions and health problems but I hope you will want to turn a new leaf and be the best you you can be so start to take care of you so that you can help to take care of others so I'm so happy y'all came to hang with me today to find out about these mindset habits make sure that you start to implement and build on your own but I hope that these will get you started it's special since we're at the beginning of the new year you're the master of your fate and the captain of your soul make sure that you comment share this video with someone who can use it and subscribe thanks so much for watching guys beautiful brown baby doll haze thanks so much for all the love and support over on my new website if you haven't already go ahead and check it out and join me for new ways to interact with me giveaways and prizes weekly emails as well as my free 8 day supernatural video course which is free when you sign up [Music]