Damien Lemon Has A High Strip Club Experience


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damn yeah sounds good Sawa I love coming here it's my second time coming here tell jokes look into some citizenship opportunities I'm not really rockin with the strip clubs anymore I can't do it you know I know I used to be a strip club like I used to be an enthusiast but uh you know fake love has gotten expensive you know I went to Atlanta Georgia we don't anything about Atlanta Georgia Atlanta Georgia is like the strip club capital of the world they look at you like I got a book a flight he next to his lady like I ran up they gonna need to see what's poppin yeah it's official like it's part of the economy you know like they they go hard strippers drive big cars you know they got kids in private school you know strip clubs are big like mega churches you know it's serious New York you could just slip in you know discreet storefront Atlanta it's like a huge parking lot you might have to give somebody the keys to your car you know it's a whole situation so I'm in Atlanta we had the strip club now I told you they got a parking lot I've never been in a parking lot at a strip club before so we know what to do you know we we were there a little early we might have been a little thirsty was there a little early so uh I asked my friend we're gonna do in the parking lot before the strip club man was like well let's smoke a joint you know get high before we go into the strip club I said I that sounds cool I've never been high in a strip club before that might feel like some 3d IMAX type of thing so I said I let's do we get into the car we hotbox like we about 17 years old we get smacked I know we ha cuz I exit the vehicle like a mullah and I step out like doosh doosh I'm inhaling air like I've never had oxygen before it's amazing feel great I'm on the runway to be in super high but in that moment all I need to really take me to that next level all I need all I want is just like a bottle of water you know like something like that low 16-ounce bottle though you know low water for two reasons one to counteract the cottonmouth but then two to stabilize the high you know I'm 130 some year 30s there's a thin line between a good and a panic attack you understand so I don't want to be in a strip club bogging out again you know so we go to the strip club one thing you should know about a strip club is the strip club is similar to the airport in the way that the prices are inflated right so go to you know go to the ball the bartenders at the strip clubs are always beautiful they always always never show it so the feels limited-edition you'll do a little bit more there's a bunch of waters behind her on the bar and I asked the lady I say hey how much for one of those waters now 16 ounces of water in the u.s. it's no more than a dollar a dollar 50 that's what I'm wanting to hear she looks at me she says ten dollars so sent into my head oh you know but I couldn't let hunt know I want to let on I just walk through the joint so I said I let me get one of them $10 dollar waters please yeah I said that deliberately to let her know listen I know that you want some but I want you to know that I know that that's that a game with $10 took my water no tip you're not gonna get me twice I'm Patti you know take my water walk to my table I sit down put my water on the table another thing to know is the water you know the strip club is similar to tinder before a tender and the way that you know if you don't like what you see you could just swipe left is some news to come so I'm in them sitting at my table I'm swiping I'm probably like eight women deep very indecisive you know I'm about to spend a mean twenty seven dollars I don't know what that converts to out here but it's I'm spending some going through the eighth woman walks up she's about a hundred and sixty pounds 30 of which is all fake now I know it's fake cuz it don't match her thighs you know it looks like a mini fridge is on her back I like but I don't like just fate do you know that's just a little too much so I swipe all right take it easy Boop she don't move you know so now I got a swipe but get a little bit more deliberate a little bit more fake nice I'm like thank you you know what else she still doesn't move she just looked at me she was like you don't even know what I could do so no all right now weird it out because I don't know what to say oh no small talk for the strip club so I said well what's your talent you know she'll say anything she just looks at me she looks at my water looks at me looks my water looks at me she takes my water she grabs it takes my water bottle turns and lodges it deep in her butt cheeks she turns around she starts clapping at in a peekaboo fashion to where I could see my water but then I can't see my water now I could see my water that I can't see my water I could see my water after a while I can't even see my water it's going so fast and I'm high so I'm stuck it feels like that you know it's like a lava lamp I'm in it for about a verse in the hook but then at that point I'm like you know what I'm quite you know at what point is this woman gonna relinquish my water bottle I'm quite thirsty you know finally about four minutes twenty seconds goes by the record fades out she turns around she relaxes her butt cheeks my water bottle comes tumbling out onto the table the water bottle looks like a paraplegic you know you know I can't stand on its own she walks off on her way to the locker room I see a high five about four shrimp was like yeah we got him it was in that moment I realized I was targeted well that's why I don't put the strip club anymore because the water is too expensive anyway Montreal I'm Damien Levitt thank you so much good night