Erica Campbell Speaks On Doing The Soul Work To Uncover True Beauty Mary Mary History More

Breakfast Club morning everybody is de jmv Angela yeesh all I mean the guy we are the breakfast club we got a special guest in the building yes indeed erica Campbell welcome thank you thank you glad to be here now you might know her from the group Mary Mary yes you know uh Shawn Porter walked out to God and me this weekend and his fight yeah I saw that I wished he would have won no loss but it wasn't right he was like he lost his show they both showed a lot absolutely I always feel honored when people use my music and stuff like that even for events like that yeah you know life is life they're boxers I watched I watch boxing all right yes let's talk from the beginning I want to give people a little history Mary Mary yes you and your sister how did you start that group and create that group and how did you get into the music industry for people that don't know um people who don't know um we were just two girls from Inglewood who sang I happened to meet my husband Warryn Campbell who came to a play that we were in and heard us saying we happened to me because he thought I was cute and then we started talking about music and he was like yeah I should be a group now we had been singing all our life but never as a group so that was his suggestion and then um he decided to call us Mary Mary and we wanted a reason to keep the name of course - Mary's in the Bible one consider perfect by many and the other not so much so we're able to tell people that doesn't matter who you are where you come from your life can be changed by the power of the love of Jesus and then we had an opportunity to be signed by two labels we flew to New York like no money stayed in one hotel room it was either Sony or bad boy and so we met with both companies and chose to go with Columbia boy y'all prayed on it and now it wasn't right it just wasn't a right deal for us so what we were looking for you know at that time but you know buffets are good still cool to this day yeah I mean in God just blessed us we wanted to make sure that our we were singing a kind of gospel that could reach the people who didn't always go to church on Sunday morning correct that's my father's ministry was we went to prisons growing up we were always in the hood always telling people Jesus loved them and praying for people so we wanted to do that kind of music and I feel like we were blessed to do that and yeah I feel honored anytime I meet somebody that says they love Mary my sister love your music or my grandma that's what I hear all the time specially contused my grandmother love your music like what about you bright you don't love it nice cool dog how long did it take for people to realize y'all names aren't really Mary and Mary I think people still call us Mary this day but it's all good I mean it's all love if that's all they know you know to mean like just like you may not know all the names of everybody an Earth Wind and Fire it's cool I don't get offended by what happened with the group you still owe the label unavailable uh-huh that's not recording well you know life shifts and stuff we had a reality show and my sister went through some issues in her marriage and just wanted to make sure the family was all the way on point and she fell like she felt like she had some soul work that she needed to do and you can't ever be mad at anybody trying to be better from the inside out so I was like okay so what am I gonna do now and I realized I just had to stand on my own two feet it was it was great for me because I had spent so much time with my sister always together the girls everything our birthdays are true that too two days apart we are married one year apart we had babies so everything was side-by-side and I just think I needed some time to be Erica just Erica not Erica and Tina not one of the girls and so I've been able to really tap into who I am feel confident in that and write this book write this music and just kind of move forward and feel not feel bad for it because when you're in a big family and one person is doing good you almost feel bad and you feel responsible to bring everybody on and I don't think that is a weight that people need to carry though a lot of people do and my family didn't put that pressure on me I just felt it oh here work with me here let's do this let's do that and I felt like God was like just breathe and just be yourself just appreciate Who I've made you to be enjoy that and don't feel guilt or shame to you know because your blessing some people literally feel embarrassed by their blessings they they dumb it down or oh my got this new house but it's only it only cost this and I got this new car why because hip hop artists don't do that you know you don't but you know in the gospel world sometimes you almost feel bad for being blessed people think you profiting off God yeah but I mean I mean if you work hard I think God blesses you there are a lot of people who want to understand and that's okay but I think how you present your gospel and how you live out your life is everything it has to be with humility because I know how to put myself here God did let's talk about this book more than pretty yes doing the sole work that uncovers your true beauty what does that soul work look like hmm it looks like being honest with the good and bad of you it looks like not suppressing the things that have happened to you the things that have hurt you I think sometimes we were so busy moving forward and trying to achieve and trying to do this and that tell we don't really pay attention to our own wounds just kind of slap a bandaid on it and keep going but that stuff is still there and so I don't think you can be fully happy truly happy until you deal with some stuff from your past man and you sometimes that requires conversations that are difficult yet there are a lot of therapy a lot of Prayer a lot of meditation just by yourself I think a lot of note-taking and I think this book was very therapeutic for me things that I have it hadn't even realized um that I had come to a resolve and I was like oh Eric are you smarter than you think you are you've overcome more than you thought you did it's easy because I'd sing for Jesus so everything is Oh in the morning you'll be all right and praise the Lord and sometimes it's like I don't really feel that and let me figure out why what am i upset about what why am I just going with the flow why am i saying praise the Lord just for the sake of saying it and so I had to find out what was real and this book allowed me to do that and I feel so so good and I want to share it with as many people as I can because I mean depression is crazy people committing suicide and I think if you learn to be grateful for it the small things and realize who you are and that God created you and there's greatness on the inside of you even if your life was jacked up all of that can still serve a purpose maybe that's your story maybe that's your movie your book your whatever and you have to kind of press pass that to get to the best part of you and that's what this book is doing for me and I hope that's for others I'm trying to get people mentally healthy I do I do how you think is everything you know I tell people don't pray Lord I want you to bless me oh but if you don't like you just countered yourself and that's what people do right I want a great marriage but let me get this prenup and let me get this all in order in case this nigga trip I mean like you're not even preparing for greatness like we speak like that my child is gonna be - terrible tools like why do we do those small things that speak so loudly I even for some of the best stuff we use negative words all she bad why can't we say good you know I mean it's it's small things that we use oh that's terrible oh my that's correct like we have to be careful with our words and I think they're very crucial from a small age we can't say to our sons the girl's gonna be crazy for him you prepping him to be a hoe or if you see a little girl she growing in our cars are you know they're gonna be after her why can't we teach them to treat their bodies like quick queens and kings why can't we speak that a lot of times we speak so much we do I do it it's hard sometimes yeah but I just change that it's like a low frequency water yeah it is a low frequency where it absolutely true and when you learn to force yourself to live on a higher level I mean I think you rest easier at night because you know when you be acting a fool you know when your heart you know you've been you know acting crazy online Bankrate you need me like man I don't even really feel good about that and I want to sleep well at night does that mean I'm gonna be perfect every time no but i'ma try I wanted to talk about something that you were talking about reveal repair remove and replace yes let's talk about that a little bit so when I did my first solo record I put out a little more Jesus I had this team that I thought was amazing and I used Mary Mary's team because that's what I was used to and that it was new people and all people and they just didn't mix at all and I was literally two weeks before releasing that everybody knows when you're releasing something your team is crucial you got deadlines you got all kind of stuff to to meet I lost three people three weeks two weeks before the record was coming out but I had prayed because it was so much turbulence - so much so much turmoil in the team I was like Lord reveal who's not for me and who's not supposed to be here replace them repair the relationship if possible and then repair remove reveal remove repair or replace and that was my prayer the guy will reveal who was not supposed to be there remove them repair and then replace them God definitely replaced him with an amazing amazing team and I didn't think it was possible to be done with such a small team but the team was small passionate and powerful and we got it done the record came out it was number one for like 13 weeks it was interesting because one of my first comments on um on iTunes was oh no honey you don't need a little more Jesus you need a little more Tina because you're the pretty one and she's the singer and I'm like oh that hurt a little bit but I just kept going I could have allowed that to you know make me angry and go live and tell people OFF that was that person's opinion that's fine but I think that you know the success and the Grammy and to keep going all of that spoke louder then that person's opinion and that's what um that prayer allowed me to do to RIF even reveal stuff about me that's not good cuz I think when situations come it's like a test how are you going to respond to you get mad first um do you stop and reflect first what do you do first I think it speaks volumes do you get sad first do you get violent first you get defensive I always try to take a beat when something hits me like in the chest okay what is his for is it's trying to distract me is there something amazing coming some big deal that's coming in a month and I'm gonna destroy myself by making a stupid decision right now um I I just try to go a little bit slower even though life moves us fast I just tried to take my time so God can always revealed to me who I am who's around me replace them repair the relationship if possible because I don't believe in making enemies anybody that doesn't work for me we still cool to this day and then replace them with who's supposed to be there in the book you also say knowing yourself is no small project like why is it important to know exactly who you are it's it's everything because usually we don't start out knowing ourselves we know everybody around us I know my friends I know my family I eat what my mama cooks I go to church because my mama go to church you know all my homegirls do this I do this all my boys do this I do this and so you have to figure out what you want there's an analogy that I give in the book about you know young girls we all eat eggs on Saturday on Saturday we go eggs yeah eggs we love eggs somewhere around your 20s you realize I don't really like eggs on one say no I want to rock the boat cuz that's what we do so in your mind you think you're hey y'all can we have Mexican food they're like nah gir we eggs well in your 30s you get a little more courage hey y'all really I don't really like them but by your 40s you'd be like listen don't talk to me about eggs and I don't want eggs I love y'all y'all my friends you have eggs I'm having not sure it's owning who you are knowing what you like feeling comfortable it doesn't mean the trip to throw people away it just means they have to grow with you that's what I was able to do with my circle of girlfriends I was like listen y'all yes I'm in entertainment and I'm I'm blessed but I'm the same Erica who only had two dollars for the taco party back in the day I'm still that same girl grow with me don't leave me I need y'all to rock with me because I feel like my friends especially the ones that know me from childhood they're part of my foundation they pray for me they cheer me on they're there when I have successes and failures I can go to the house take the wig off shoes off kick it laugh cry whatever and so they've been able to grow with me we've hit some bumps and bruises but we've been through some stuff too many people throw friends away you throw good people away because y'all disagreed over one thing one maybe four or five things but who cares you know you don't always see eye to eye everything is not gonna be you're not gonna agree on everything you have to agree to disagree yeah we definitely agree that nachos are good for breakfast I don't know what that is it's a Mexican dish you have eggs and beans a little chicken I'm from LA my name is Maria but I heard you say it made me think about it right mm-hmm he talked about self-pleasuring are you saw that huh and then you talked about you know what you were thinking where does God go when you when your self pleasure a man where does he go and it made me think about that so what made you think about self pleasuring and where God goes when you taking care of yourself uh somebody asked me the question was it wrong was it right now I know some churches say for the brothers listening to keep you from slipping up so going to handle yourself I heard some women say oh you know I take care of myself before I go out on a date so you know I just I think about purity and purity happens before the actual action of whatever you do whatever you watch what have you listen to whatever you do with yourself um your mind being a place of purity is very crucial but I think in our society today everything is sexualized I mean you be selling chicken and they gonna have a pair of boobs they're like it's just everywhere and so I think guarding your mind and guarding your thoughts and treating sex and sexuality as something beautiful that God created that's supposed to be otherworldly and you come together with somebody and you just create this beautiful things where your lives come together it's not so cheap it's not I mean I just don't think it's why I don't think was just supposed to be done by yourself I just I mean I got a amazing fine wonderful husband I just I don't have to I got a husband and now I know for singles it may be a different story but there are Mary people who they I mean they just rather handle it thyself I just can't imagine what your husband feel like I got now got to compete your toys and I gotta become it's just too much yeah and God not going away I don't think he the same place he going you have sex I'm sure you go when you masturbate well no I don't think he's stupid he gave us a choice so you can choose him or not I don't think he I don't the bible does say that god cannot look on sin so I do think God turns when we make the wrong choices and do the wrong thing I think he wishes that we would do the right thing but I think he there he's too holy he's too righteous he too awesome to participate in the foolery that men or women choose to do it between you and God I just I just think when you are trying to live a purer life you're not I'm saying if you're trying to be abstinent if you're trying to hold yourself and keep yourself for this beautiful special wonderful moment you know I mean our life with the with the you know with the spouse then I think yeah you should don't lessen it don't cheapen it I remember when I was a young girl and I was in church and one of our youth leaders explained it this way she said I'm not telling you that sex is an amazing and beautiful wonderful she said it is but imagine all through your teenage years you sleep with all these dues and and Tony blows your mind but you get married to Richard and Richard ain't as good as Tony now you in your marriage trying to combat all this stuff in your mind and I think that's what happens especially when you are like overly sexual before you get married you the person that you would now has to combat with all this sexual information and all this inventory that you didn't deal with because getting married don't make it go away I know people think I'm nice let me settle down and get married but you never deal with you're wise or whose or get those people out of your so because those are so Thais yeah sometimes you are emotionally and connected to all these people that you've been with and you're trying to figure out why you can't be settled with one person because you gotta get you got to break all that stuff you get delivered from that stuff you got to detach your soul because especially for women because we are the receivers you got to detach your soul from all these people who sometimes leave a deposit and walk away or sometimes it's the women who walk away whatever you got to get your soul and your mind right and get to a pure place of just wanting to be with one person I think that's why God when he said it's not good for man to be alone he knew that we were created to be in covenant and community in relationship before he made a church he made a man and a woman he made a marriage made a family and I think that it was a beautiful design you know and so we can't mess it up are you saying don't masturbate before marriage that all you heard are located masturbate during marriage is wrong period no I don't unless I'm not judging nobody I'm just talking about what God created em hmm I feel like God created something beautiful and it's always the enemy's job to pervert it to twist it to to corrupt it to make it filthy and no matter what you know people who don't you know love God or serve God or subscribe to God it all do it's your own choice he made us he gave us free will we can choose him or not but there is a way that is right there is a way that is that is honoring God and the scripture says there's a way that seems right to man so of course most people I'm gonna do what I want I feel good about it you probably do but that doesn't mean that it lines up with what God wants for you and I feel like God's plan is always a bigger better and more awesome plan that we can't see and we don't understand but I believe there is greatness in that obedience in that in that faith you know the scripture says all things are possible to them that believes so if you believe you can't do what you want now you criticize a lot for the clothes that you wear yeah now how do you feel about that cuz it seems like the church criticize you because your clothes cut up jeans etc etc etc it's not everybody it's some people the negativity is always louder I remember when the the white dress I'm listening I'm in white again on the cover of my book I'm a courageous woman and I don't feel bad about it I believe God put me in my curves I was by women who felt very comfortable in their feminism in their sexuality you know I saw them being fun and flirtatious and beautiful and I thought that was awesome and I couldn't wait to grow up to be that kind of woman um I didn't see sexy as a bad word and I still don't and I don't think that church people should portray that because that's why I think young church people were like I can't be a cute fly sexy chicken love Jesus I gotta be homey and boring and I that's not how I grew up I grew up with beautiful women and so I feel comfortable in my skin and actually probably one of the first person to call me and say that I look great in a dress with CeCe Winans ain't nobody saving acc1 is I mean CeCe Winans mama Shirley Yolanda Adams they all called and supported me and my mama ain't nobody saving my mama um so I felt comfortable everybody's not gonna like it it's fine what happened to come as you are it wasn't the church model at one point yeah and it still is but you know there's always people to get it wrong you know I'm saying there's always people who feel like they are defending the faith by keeping people out you not good enough if you're not good enough you the perfect person is supposed to embrace you yeah absolutely it's where you're supposed to come but unfortunately some churches have made people feel like you can't come not my church we passed a church called California worship center in North Hollywood and everybody's welcome I don't change you God does the changing I just love you I just give you the information I have I help you as much as I can you know be there support you to help you be your best self no matter where you come from what your lifestyle what you're dealing with I think God's love is for everybody in chapter 4 you talk about looking in God's mirror yeah what did that mean to you seeing myself the way he sees me he says I'm fearfully and wonderfully made he doesn't see my brokenness the way I see it he doesn't see um my insecurities the way I see them he sees me as victorious he sees me as powerful and so that's what I have to say to myself especially when I make mistakes or have issues or you know I'm super insecure even though I'm singing about Jesus I have to remind myself of what God said about me because his words are more powerful than mine and so I used him I have a lot of affirmations in the book I am powerful I'm strong I'm beautiful I'm fun I'm necessary I'm a good wife I'm a good businesswoman I'm a good mama I'm a sister a good friend I'm necessary I'm valuable I'm worthy I think these are all things that we should say to ourself on a regular basis because life got away and not just women men too of making us not feel worthy of of great things that happen in our life we ever jealous of your sister at all Tia yeah uh-uh no no we didn't we never I don't think we ever had that problem I think our issue was we always trying to correct each other I wanted her to be no Tina see you talking too much you're saying too much and she's like see you not saying enough you sound like an old lady like you know we would go back and forth and we shouldn't talk that long in between that song we should have done this we should have wore something else which it was silly stuff and we just gave each other licence to be absolutely who you are you'd be perfectly Tina I'll be perfectly Erica God aligned us together and will bless the world that way we won't bless the world we keep fighting backstage and coming onstage in tears because we know we was a fool backstage and God's grace allowed us to still bless people people didn't know all that stuff but we're human yeah that's right then y'all will pray didn't y'all get Allstate not fist fight but like you know like a girl arguing and then we get on stage and there's no way you can sing about this loving amazing God and I feel conflicted and convicted and sometimes right on stage I will go I'm sorry I'm sorry I didn't mean it I'm sorry we will hug it out right there on stage we had two older ladies one would they were 67 and 65 and they hadn't spoken to each other in like four years and they were watching the Mary Mary show and it was the episode when we went to therapy and we were talking it out and I we were expressing what wasn't working for us anymore and they said they watch that episode and called each other and they were able to mend their relationship by watching us be honest and I think that's the purpose of being honest man you can't get nowhere hide and everything that you've been through I've been through it I've overcome it and so now let me share and maybe help somebody else get through so I think me and Tina being honest as you know not only helped us heal but helped other people as well how did you feel when you found out Tina voted for Trump I was like she was like well it was either a clown or a snake I was like nah man oh I just I mean I just didn't really understand it at all I mean she sees now we talk about it now was like hey I got duped like everybody else and not everybody knows everybody in before um some things we talked about and some I mean I allow her to make her her own choices you know and I think whoever voted for him I think they see now right unless she's just crazy they won't admit that they made a mistake yeah I know she'll she admits it like not at wedding well listen thought I was doing the right thing clearly was not what I think about Kanye jumping into gospel music I'm so excited about it I think it's so good for many reasons because he doesn't have to he don't need you know he don't need to do this he's already a bajillion air so for him to do this it has to be in my opinion a God move in his life I'm sure his team and people like no I was sure about this now you know I mean can we sell this but he came to California worship center when I say they were the nicest he was most polite and kind that came early they brought 200 choir members 50 drummers were nothing but gracious the church enjoyed it hearing the praise in the building was absolutely amazing I think he's just trying to figure this God thing out and I think as many people should pray for him as possibly can because he gonna come under attack you know people ask him while he's doing it but here's what I say to the Christians who think that he doesn't have a right I don't think there's a bad hallelujah I don't think there's a bad I don't think you ever say thank you Jesus and God go now I want that from you I think God always appreciates someone showing him gratitude so him going around the country singing gospel music and including people that probably wouldn't necessarily walk in a church building I think it's good if people act like it's such a stretch for him like absolutely I mean I think it's really really great I think as you grow older you always grapple with you know God's existence especially if you have been in a place where you like phnom kulen God you know you grow older you just start thinking differently and I pray for him he's talked to Warren and I many times and so I think it's really awesome that he's making his faith move and I also think it's really cool for young church kids who feel like we corny because we do gospel and they man if somebody like him or even chance the rapper having you know gospel stuff and praying and common and different ones who are bold about their faith I think it's amazing for young church kids to realize we have something that we can offer the world hope and healing and help love and all these things that help you sleep better at night that help you walk through this life with a little more confidence with your head held a little bit higher because you know I have somebody greater than me stronger than me looking out for me and your chapter deceived and distracted you talk about how you caught two Usher's at church man I was 16 and I walked past is Asher and I heard her say she probably having sex now wasn't um I just happened to be you know a little curvy for a young girl and it made me insecure it made me wonder was I doing something wrong and I love my church family I grew up in a like a mean judgmental chart like I loved those people we had so so much fun the youth ministry was crazy and saying bunch of young people and so I got super insecure and you know number things you go through life you make some bad choices because you feel like this is what they think of me anyway um and then I was writing this book and I realized she might not have even been talking to me she could've been talking about somebody else I am on this all this time and made this position she should have said this to me whatever and maybe she wasn't talking talking to me maybe she wasn't talking about me and I think a lot of times that happens your insecurities or we we take ownership of people's words when we don't have to and so now I have a more duck-like quality I just let the road the words roll off like water on a duck's back I just don't own people's negativity at all in no way shape or form I don't take people personal whether they are angry towards me it's a reflection of where they are not me I didn't do anything wrong I'm being me living my best life as best I can and so you know I pray for people even people leave cat nasty comments like oh god bless you sister pay for everybody is this somebody that you will not pray for and somebody there now I pray everybody everybody I mean you have to know that sometimes I really think God does send some prayer requests as fanfilm Lord Jesus helped a man know God trying to cover itself time there is no prayer that waste got time no no every conversation adds and I think every time you get a little bit closer to what you really want to say you know your prayers maybe surface you know in the beginning you asking for money in a marriage and you know get you your enemies and all that kind of stuff then it grows to something deeper that's in your soul what do you really want I think everybody wants to be loved and seen and heard you want to feel valuable and sometimes you didn't grow up in a family where you got that you know what I mean or you didn't have that with the people around you and so you you you create a life that makes you feel good but you still don't feel good I think you got to go back to your heart and your source and find out who you are and whose you are and rest in that alright we appreciate you for joining us that's right more than pretty and out right now now you know we got to leave with a prayer now come on absolutely lord I thank you for The Breakfast Club I thank you for each and every person in this room right now I thank you that you are keeping them safe from all hurt harm in danger I thank you God that their destiny and purpose is in your hands I thank you that greatness is on the inside of them and they understand it realize it and see it I thank you God that they will feel your love your power your presence God and in their moves that they make and in their decisions I thank you for blessing their family their children their loved ones in Jesus name I thank you for covering them and keeping them God safe from all harm and danger in Jesus name I pray thank God amen man more than pretty right now make sure you get it it's erica Campbell it's The Breakfast Club good morning [Music]