Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Jan 18

[Applause] hey guys Jules here for what Culture dot-com with another episode of the most insane things happening in wrestling right now the show that does exactly what it says on the tin in the most annoying way possible you are very very welcome now it's actually been a bit quiet on the wrestling oddities this week maybe the WWE and company are feeling the general malaise of January that seems to be hitting us all right now but I will endeavor to find the maddest moments for you right now but as a side note before we begin it is January it is dark and cold outside but I hope that you are treating yourself well both physically and mentally you deserve to treat yourself the best you possibly can and do not let anyone tell you otherwise you matter you are important I want those positive mental health images and vibes getting out the doors quickly and I too will move on out the door by hanging that intro [Music] now we begin with a bit of Blighty ball gargling as the NXT UK takeover show was so bloody good there were a lot of us worried here in the office that it might fall foul to a lack of interest and maybe a lack of care from the WWE but it was brilliant the opening tag match was just outstanding with some truly nasty looking spots Tyler bate performs like how he dresses okay a magnificently beautiful wizard Trent 7 sold expertly Zach Gibson thought as obnoxiously as he talks and James Drake performs some insane moves that even in this day and age managed to surprise then we had the surprise return of Finn Balor which resulted in a really decent match Mastiff and Dennis beat the piss out of each other and while there were some lower moments it never dropped below good wrestling the only real noticeable issues were in the main event with the big two Boches but even this proved something to the world that needs to be acknowledged Pete Dunn will bring anyone to his level no matter who they are this was an insane accomplishment for the WWE and I am so happy to see British wrestling rub shoulders with other NXT pay-per-views in terms of quality hell even Vince noticed well kinda what Lee tweeted about it afterwards when the crowd was chanting oh you wore two boots but Bernie said yes I did yes it was awesome and by that I mean that his PR dude who manages his account tweeted for him but what is brilliant about this tweet is that it somehow managed to capture the belittling mentality for NXT has nothing more than a proving ground for his show now read it like this yes I did yes it was awesome that's probably closer to how he meant it I'm just kidding Vince yeah yeah leathery sofa otice doze ovitch as what cultures Andy Murray discovered appears to be taco nights pet he's a gibbering endearing animal that makes it inexplicably amusing the nonsense sounds and he has a cult personality amongst NXT fans who just gravitate towards his anthropomorphic thing that he is and he just appears to have watched Randy Savage from outside of his house and just decided to become the first-ever interspecies WWE superstar and this dog had quite the bone on Monday a bone for Alexa bliss seemingly lost without his leash he interrupted Alexa bliss his moment of bliss segment with Paul Heyman and he shuddered around making odd noises like okay and he moved his hand up and down like Randy Savage he shouted oh yeah like Randy Savage and he wouldn't allow a woman a proper spotlight kind of like Randy Savage but then he randomly blurted out brilliant every lady before his keeper removed him from the scene now while we at home a pot large for this the audience had no idea what to make of it nor did Heyman all bless who at the end of the segment just stood and looked at each other without saying anything until the cameras faded down their robot brains overloaded by this organic matter in his ramblings the worst thing about this is is that it completely just was done at the wrong moment they had just announced the women's Tag Titles and here we had heavy machinery making sure that we moved swiftly on from the women and to focus on the weirdos thankfully didn't shag our leg but in bad news this is gonna happen again next week am i right Matt Haven Ring of Honor darling and member of the kingdom has been taking quite a few shots at the poor old revival this week which led to some rather humorous stories being unearthed according to Taven the revivals current storyline placement that of being put down like a dog by the WWE and treated with about as much respect as I give thought about meat because I am such a toy boy was too similar to that of his own angle after making waves online Scott Dawson responded along the lines of are you kidding why would we choose to be made to look like tits alongside a little story that painted Taven himself to be a bit of a thief now according to Dawson in 2012 a tryout Haven apparently stole tanning lotion leading to everybody getting a right old Bulacan after being named and shamed Haven fired back by stealing the Shasta machine on a ring of on a show it's all very playschool and was made even worse when the cameras didn't even capture Li capture Li properly capture the moment properly at the Ring of Honor show which made it a lot they were trying to steal another WWE gimmick the terrible directing of Kevin Dunn zing now the revival apparently requested their release this Monday but they were still doing it while wearing their ring gear they ain't going anywhere both within the WWE and outside of it not with aw waiting in the wings to snatch up quality talent Vinnie Mac ain't got a plate that speaking of Vinnie Mac just imagine this scene right now I'm Vinnie Mac on this side and Kevin down on the other what's unique to women that we can use to market and promote him more effectively hits someone choice my friend well that was right anyway don't you Dave get a bit risque this week because faced with tumbling ratings the company reverted to what worked so successfully for them in the past and no it wasn't them allowing their talent to cut their own promos and sell themselves to the audience but scantily dressed women this despite four years are telling us that women's wrestling is progressive now good job Alexa bliss on Raw was filmed in a state of undress for no reason whatsoever other than just to arouse the menfolk of the WWE Universe then on Smackdown Mandy Rose concocted a secret scheme on bloody camera to frame Jimmy O so as an adulterer right so she wore black lingerie in a hotel room or the most risque black brown pants you can buy from bloody Tesco and then she tried but she failed it's almost as if revealing your plan on TV wasn't a smart idea Mandy you tool and it led to a brawl that went on for so long that I was able to fill my brain slipping out from my ears however there was another factor in it that was so silly that I cannot not include it in order fraying Jimmy she hired a paparazzo to hide in the bathroom all the while goddamn ignoring that the entire thing was being filmed by WWE cameras could have saved herself a bit of money as WWE's YouTube sure were quick to put up the video with her and her khaks superman d hamming it up while making a mare with her mammaries are you aiming a giraffe nice fire extinguisher no it's going outside quick we have two little snowman when is the WWE like an eagle no well I tell you what I didn't want to blind the audience I would have my hat blown off by the magic mind powers that you have also it's when the WW acts like Hotel California and never lets anyone leave their bloody contracts like the Eagle like the Eagles yeah well done yeah like the band clever I didn't come up with it in addition to the revival the rumor mill is going bat bull's mental that several other WWE performers are thinking about leaving Mike and Maria Kanellis reportedly tried to hand in their notices a few weeks back but were met with the resounding no no we need you to appear on 2:05 live once in every six weeks it's a very weird situation to be in no we don't want to use you but we don't want to appear weak in the slightest and we'll keep paying you a wage it's becoming like the WWE is a collector of wrestling figures never removing them from boxes except in this case it is devaluing the worth of the individual pieces yet the truly interesting case was with Dolph Ziggler who apparently asked to be taken off of TV and given a producer role now Ziggler can still go as we've already seen last year but the WWE made sure that he knew his place by saying no to this request as well so what we've now got a rather humorous image of Dolph wanting to show solidarity to the company but even being refused to do that you'll stay in the ring until you're dead or worthless that seems to be the company's line at the moment so yeah the WWE is kind of like the Hotel California of sports entertainment conglomerates you can enter but you can never ever leave and also it's a bit overplayed and liked by weirdos and there we go those are the most insane things happening in wrestling this week thank you so much for watching now to close out the show the only way I know how I read my favorite comments from last week's episode and you might remember that I asked you a special question which was to basically write us a match it was going to be between viscera and Kurt Angle and you guys had to fill in the blanks and I have some of the best ones here the first one is from Barrett Scott who says it's January 1988 in the mid-south Coliseum a young bit basura must be very young must defend the honor of his sister against an upstart Kurt Angle forget the history you have read Kurt's first taste of wrestling was in Memphis not ECW viscera is enraged at the smaller Kurt trying to vet his sister as the match is concluding Angle performs a botched prerunner of the Angle Slam the effects not being observed until nearly 20 years later viscera eats away his feelings and refers to himself as Mabel his sister's illegitimate son is brought up as a wrestler later called Jason Jordan origin story that's actually kind of brilliant I think that amazing that one I've just sworn brilliant ass good next up Marshall Schaffer and I press the wrong button stop trying to log into my paypal yeah honestly this stuff just becomes my actual calendar I forget the days and I'm just like Tuesday ups and downs before Wednesday ups and downs for Smackdown Friday insane things I need to get an actual life you don't because that's actually helping us out quite considerable it display so yeah thank you very much very nice but didn't have to be put the match no but the person below did though see whoa Kurt Angle vs. viscera in a Jason Jordan on a pole match Jason Jordan comes back finally after injury acting different from before acting cold to his father Kurt's after six episodes with Kurt on the phone in backstage segments Corey graves tells him Jason Jordan has joined a cult big V appears in a bad reveal to be the leader of the cult and they have an eight-minute match Oh specifically at 8 minutes because Jordans interference just so Curt can team with Chad gable against viscera and Jordan in a much better match now I love that because that's not just booking and answering a question but that's actually setting up the angle behind every line mayor I enjoyed that but yes thank you so much for those there were loads more but what we're gonna do is only read out a few of our favorite ones to keep it enticing keep it sweet keep it sexy because we have one more for you next week I want to see what you guys think of booking and I'm gonna go for you said you wanted to go for Gangrel Gangrel ease bloody everywhere at the moment and I love him and I wanna see him go up against Molly Holly what you guys burn the blanks and we'll read that out the best ones in the next Molly alone yes as always I of be in joules he has been filled thank you so much for your continued work on the show Phil actually gets to congratulate you in person now answer Michael Cedric for helping write these episodes you guys at home you are incredibly awesome never forget that go follow me at retro J with a zero over on Twitter and at fill my chambers on Twitter and Instagram we will speak to you next week take it easy and be kind to yourself always jigging again fantastic I thought that stopped I thought you said it was too tiring I can do it see you next week don't coffee she's a goddess aggressive chicken

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