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brothers and sisters let me share with you something when you get interested in someone boy and girl let's say we'll talk about normal straight people insha'allah that's the easy one i we understand that the others we don't understand it when you fall into an interest in someone you go through three stages that scientists have studied number one there is the lust stage lust when you lust for someone two hormones are released in your brain for the men more testosterone for the girls more estrogen but they both have estrogen and testosterone except in lesser levels than each other this hormone does nothing except or it serves your reward your reward center it's like drugs once you feel it the first time you want to feel it again no purpose except feeling testosterone estrogen once you fulfill that need the testosterone estrogen goes away and all you're left with is the after effects allahu alam what they are once you fall into lust there is a second stage if you continue following that relationship and it's called attraction when you when you get to the stage of attraction it lasts for weeks or months this usually happens in the way they are the people who are engaged to be married you have attraction attraction releases hormones called dopamine and other hormones and it lessens something called serotonin serotonin gives you satisfaction security and so on the others they make you energetic you start to fantasize a lot you start to get energetic start doing things you never did before and then you say wow he's changed me she has brought out something in me that i've never seen before he said words to me that no one's ever said to me before they just flooded me brothers and sisters this is not real these are just the hormones telling you that it's like watching a mad movie fast and furious it lasts for about few weeks and months and what happens is that you feel this beautiful thing coming which is nice in halal way beautiful enjoy in halal it's beautiful it's one of the best things you can ever you know and really embrace it because you're not going to feel it much again later on what but but allah doesn't leave you there if you follow that relationship it turns into something beautiful which allah tells us this is where the real relationship is and it's called attachment this is the husband and wife this is a family attachment an attachment releases a beautiful hormone called oxytocin and that is the hormone that makes you secure safe loved purpose reason importance self-esteem value when you get married everybody values you and they look at you differently isn't it correct give you an example if there is a relationship of boyfriend and girlfriend and they don't want to get married the halal way they say oh we're just getting to know each other girlfriend boyfriend let me tell you something they say what's wrong with it all right what's worse a man a woman cheating on their husband and wife when they're married or a girlfriend boyfriend cheating on each other when they're not married which one's worse when they're married like what's the difference between being married and having a relationship outside of it in the same way they're still sleeping together they still look at each other like you're for me i'm for you nobody else can touch you they're still doing the same some they share wealth together sometimes they have children together they live together 20 years de facto partnered not married what's the difference a word the only difference is one is commitment and value the other one is not commitment and not as much value he's not really valuing her she's not really valuing him because they're not ready to commit well i spend to non-muslims about this all the time and they say yeah one non-muslim lady says we've been in a relationship for like seven years and i've been telling let's get married and he's just not ready he said well if he values you he'll get money because yeah i want to value me value allah says we have honored the son of adam and allah only tells us things that honor us listen to what allah prophesy then said he told us a man or a woman whom a person a man or woman with prestige power and beauty comes to them and calls them now you might be thinking well this other young fella i remembered now he comes to me and goes and i said you got to repent to allah and so on and so he goes but i'm safe brother i'm safe okay what do you mean you're safe he goes she's not a woman of power and beauty no no no when the prophet saw assalam said a woman of power and beauty what he's saying what he's saying is any man or woman that your community or society see as desirable so it could be a celebrity it could be someone who's in the olden days wasn't really pretty could be a woman with really short hair and got red and yellow all over it doesn't matter if she's desirable that's the woman the idea is whatever is more desirable allah puts you under shade because you are struggling more anyway even zina with a normal person allah addresses it and those would not commit adultery or fornication women whoever does this act shall surely meet a terrible wrath and be placed in hell fire humiliated except he or she who repents renews their faith these people allah will transform their bad deeds into good deeds most forgiving most merciful all your past sins are gone brothers and sisters some people they say i'll have a girlfriend or boyfriend now i'll commit the haram because then i will repent later we say to you you are like the brothers of yusuf they said we will kill you for throw him in the desert and then we'll repent later but look what allah replied they suffered and if had if they had died in that instance they would go to hell fire for murder or for doing what they did for yusuf alaihissalam but allah left them alive to happen to repent alhamdulillah brothers and sisters let's look at this hadith problems happen in the future i want to tell you a few statistics it is estimated that 84 000 abortions you know what abortions are when they go to the hospital woman is pregnant doesn't want the baby and tells the doctor to kill it and get rid of it they put forceps inside into the uterus and while the baby is alive they dissect it organ by organ bit by bit as it's alive there are estimated 84 000 abortions per year in australia in adelaide the the they keeps they keep record not the other states they don't but they estimate as 84 000 abortions per year according to the research in the medical journal of australia and they are between the ages of 15 and 44. as for teenagers between the ages of 15 and 19 it is estimated around 10 000 teenage abortions between the ages of 15 and 19 in australia alone 10 000 abortions of teenagers with teenage pregnancy between 15 and 19. according to the abc the world today report it is estimated that it is 56 million abortions per year worldwide 56 million abortions per year worldwide and that's just what's recorded as for what's not recorded allah 56 million murders per year and allah says do not kill your children because you fear you will not be able to raise them provide them we are the ones who will provide them and you medical specialists are today calling excuse me for better sex education in australia well now we need sex education because it's getting out of hand to primary school students primary school students grade 3 4 5 6 sex education and for contraceptives to be made more available to teenagers in an effort to reduce the nation's teen pregnancy and abortion rates according to the abc's the world today report why do they get abortions unwanted pregnancies they're too small too young we were just having a talk before this idea of teenager never existed in islam barakallahu i learned it from sheikh muhammad today no words teenager in islam you're either a child or an adult so when we tell them you're still a child but they're actually adults they can reproduce they can get married they can have children they can do everything we say it's cute it's cute but if she gets pregnant you stupid idiot that's what we call them why we don't help them we've not allowed them and then they go to the hospital and get an abortion and kill babies we teach them to be murderers so haram sex between teenagers halal for them and some muslims think what's the problem with that and they don't see the result that a murder is happening that's what allah says in the quran here is one example murder of babies sometimes teenagers don't know what to do they're afraid either because of their parents or their culture or their tradition or because whatever it is out on the street babies end up in the trash cans orphanages are built brothers and sisters lastly stis you know stis are sexually transmitted infections or sexually transmitted diseases these are more today than ever before prophet sallam said new diseases will appear that didn't appear before listen to this one like this is staggering research i saw this in the australian abc health reports it says one of the stis called gonorrhea you know what gonorrhoea is it's one of the std sexual transmitted diseases it's very very popular very common only gonorrhea 19 000 were infected in 2015 19 000 were infected in 2015. in 2006 nine years ago only 9 000 were reported to be infected look how much more have been infected in only these years and they're saying that there is a tremendous rise in stds as the years go by because zina and adultery and fornication is also becoming more and more allah is becoming more and more there is a all these yesterdays chlamydia sephilas all these names that they brought they are on the rise and in australia chlamydia is the highest form of stds i had a sister without saying her name anonymous she said to me what do i do i have to tell my future husband the guy who's asked for my hand do i have to tell him that i've got std muslim sister in hijab everything beautiful sister loves allah but unfortunately in the past she fell into haram unfortunately these stds don't just go away you repent to allah and they still stay should i tell him i said of course you have to tell me but why islam covers the sin you shouldn't tell your sins i said that's different he's going to get infected if you get pregnant your children are going to get infected unless you get it treated and when we talk about treatment doesn't make it go away bacteria goes away but there are some of them don't go away you have to keep it under treatment like eczema if you've got children got x-men you put this cream on it just manages it if a woman hasn't managed her std and she is pregnant gives birth the child has an std for the rest of their life how bad of an end it is did you know that some stds don't show until six months later some of them don't have symptoms at all and they're in you and subhanallah what an amazing thing scientists and doctors have said they said and they keep repeating this the surest way to avoid transmission of sti is to abstain from sexual contact or to be in a long-term mutual monogamous relationship with a partner who has been tested and is known to be uninfected doesn't allah say stay away don't come close don't do this isn't that right this is already one thousand four hundred years ago from told us about this allah told us that [Music] productions [Music]